I'm Not Ready
I am not ready. I am not ready to say goodbye. I had a moment to myself the other night and sat and simply asked “why.” The tears want to come now. I have struggled with anger, with pleading and trying to bribe God. Even now I want to beg Him to change the tide in favor of what we would all like to see. Healing. Complete healing from this ravager called cancer. I am just not ready. Can you ever be? It seems crazy; I am not even blood. But. It is incredible how a person can affect you. I remember the first memorable talk at Panera. She listened and heard me, not one facial expression saying she thought I was crazy or the most horrible human. All I saw was love and a deep understanding. She walked with me through more than I could have imagined in the last four years. She is one of those friends that connects with you in such a way that you cannot imagine ever not having been her friend. She is a fire of deep passion, loving fiercely all t
